About us

I have two questions;

1. Why is the system failing these young children on a epic scale

and

1. How do we change it?

Hi, I’m Chloe and I have ALWAYS been extremely passionate about children’s mental well-being and inclusion. Before I even had my own children I worked in an early years setting quickly becoming the special needs coordinator out of default. The best default I had. I quickly became passionate about helping young children voices be heard, and opening the doors for them to access equal opportunities of learning and socialisation to those of their nurotypcial peers. I worked along side some of the most fantastic special needs coordinators in the community to inspired me to be better, do more research and raise the voices of these little people. I loved it, I attended any courses I could, I downloaded, accessed and filed so many resources so that I could be knowledge in many areas of SEND. At the time I advocated for a few little people, their voices were already being heard and all I had to do was make sure they continued to be heard. I felt great, I helped these children and families when at times things were tough, days were long and nights were even longer. When professionals involved in their child’s care were unreachable, I listen to those mummy’s and daddy’s and I took their concerns and questions seriously, I sometimes even managed to get them answers.

I have family members and friends who are SEN parents, I’ve shared their joys and highs, their tears and their lows. I’ve screamed and shouted for them in frustration, I’ve called many professionals some quite colourful names because they have let down these small people I love as well as their parents who are so desperate for support. Yet I still come back to the question “Why is the system failing these young children on a epic scale”

In reality now I can say I empathised with these parents but I had no idea how complex, and disheartening fighting for a children Rights was.

Skip to now and I have a 6 year old neuro-divergent child. It has taken me along time to allow myself to accept that I am a Mummy of a SEND child, not out of denial but I felt a fraud to those children and families who have a diagnosis (That word diagnosis has plagued me for many years now and it’s only up until recently I’m despising the term). I felt a fraud because we didn’t have a diagnosis, professionals (teachers, health visitors) even some friend and family said no there’s nothing wrong with her. They saw snippets of a child’s behaviours and deemed it ‘normal’ (what a horrible word, who and what is ‘normal’). I started to feel like a hypadondriact. I stoped talking to people about my day and battles I had faced…maybe it was me and my parenting. I had lost all hope of someone listening to me, I mean actually listening to me. Until one conversation with her teacher and she said those magical 4 words I had wanted to hear for so long “I see it too”. Those 4 words made me laugh, cry, scream and jump for joy, all at once. “I see it too”.

Eventually it seemed that others started to see it too and recognised that she needed additional support in school. Meetings were had and steps were out in place to help C manage in class. Forms were filled out phone calls and appointments booked. Including the appointment we had last week.

It was thought that we were looking at ADHD, the consultant said no it’s not ADHD, followed with the words “she has extremely strong ASD (autism spectrum disorder) traits but doesn’t fulfil the whole criteria”. What the hell do we do with that information, it’s most likely this but actually she probably won’t tick all the boxes so we can diagnose it as that. You know that feeling of standing in front of a brick wall banging your head off it? Yeah it felt like that. So now what, what do we do and where do we turn to next. More forms, more assessments more appointments. It feels like we have lots of doors partially open, in my mind they all have security chains on them so you can access them fully, and then one after the other they are shut in our faces and we’re back to “now what?”

Last week school said to me “she’s increasingly not coping in school”. C is hypervigualnt she is aware of everyone, where they are and what they are doing, every smell every sound and every movement. Her brain is like a fly always buzzing and never settling for too long before it’s buzzing around again. At the moment her school work Is average. She’s not behind but she’s not excelling. This is her NEED to please the adult, in school the adult is obviously the teacher. But as the work gets harder and her hypervigulance gets more intense how long before her little brain explodes.

So now we have to wait until these referrals are complete and those who hold the power decide whether or not she meets assessment criteria.  Will these door be opened fully for her to access the support she needs.

It infuriates me that these small people are being failed, yet these are the same small people that will grow to be the big people of our country. If we fail them now then what hope has the country got to succeed when this generation take over from current. 12.6% of children in the Uk have a SEND that’s 1.5 million of the 3.75 million children that have a SEND. 1.5 million children that need to access the system for support, the floored system where doors are shut, services not suitable or accessible, rejection after rejection, miscommunications after miscommunication. 1.5 million children that will grow into adults without the appropriate support and interventions. When will these children get the care they deserve!!!